After my 1st lesson in internet dating - I began a very cautious journey into the world of internet dating, now knowing that not everyone is as they appear.  I learnt that if he looks too good to be true, he probably is!  I quickly picked myself up after my scammer experience, slightly wounded, more sceptical and certainly more cautious and aware.

Over the coming months I spoke on line to several guys, some of which were sadder than me - some of which were up for a bit of a laugh - some of which were after a "friend with benefits".  I met some, I discounted some, some discounted me!  The people I spoke to appeared to be slighly more normal and I started to regain confidence in the whole experience.  I started dating on quite a regular basis - I began to wonder if I was slightly addicted.  Most of the men I dated, didn't get past the 1st date.  I quickly learnt that I was far too nice.  I spent many an evening with a complete jerk, but didnt have the heart to tell him after one drink that he wasnt for me and thanks but no thanks.  Instead I sat there bored to death for hours wondering how I could make my escape.

The end of the evening is always the worst.  You get some guy ask you "am I going to see you again".  It's not easy to say to someone "no".  So you find yourself saying, "I'll text you and we'll go from there".  You then get home and send them the Dear John text saying "youre a lovely bloke, but .....".

I then met Richard.  He was 5ft11, a builder, lived 25 miles away, had no kids and was that dream build of "not to thin, not to fat" and he could cook (or so he said).  We got on really well and quickly organised our 2nd date.  He took me out to dinner and although he didnt blow me away, he was nice.  We started seeing each other on a slightly irregular basis - he was an obsessed fisherman and spent many a weekend on fishing weekends with mates.  We enjoyed each other's company and I suppose we started what you could say was "a relationship".  About 2 months later, he suddenly ended it - saying he needed to find someone who he could have a family with.  He had decided he wanted to be a dad.  This was one road I was not going down again, so I ran!!!  I was quite upset - I liked him a lot.

It's amazing once you start a relationship, long or short term, when it ends, it's almost like a bereavement - you mourn, not necessarily the person, but the feeling of being part of something, the attention, the communication, the drinking partner.  So it was back to the drawing board.  So it continued, back to sifting through profiles, messages, winks to try and find "the one".